How to Say “How Are You?” in Korean (Spoiler: You Basically Don't)
How are you in Korean is technically 어떻게 지내세요? (eo-tteo-ke ji-nae-se-yo), but Koreans barely say it out loud. In real conversations you'll hear 잘 지냈어? (have you been well — reserved for reunions), 요즘 어때? (how's it going lately), or 밥 먹었어? (have you eaten), each doing a slightly different job than the one English question tries to cover.
Ask a textbook how to say “how are you” in Korean and it'll hand you 어떻게 지내세요? — technically correct, grammatically clean, and almost never the first thing out of a Korean person's mouth. It's less a greeting than an inquiry, the kind you'd read in a formal letter or hear from a customer service rep, not from your friend across a café table.
Korean small talk skips the abstract “how are you” entirely and asks something specific instead — did you eat, have you been okay since we last talked, how's this stretch of your life going. Learn those distinctions and you'll sound like someone who's actually had Korean conversations, not just studied them.
The Myth vs. What Koreans Actually Ask
어떻게 지내세요? isn't wrong — it literally means “how are you getting by,” and any Korean speaker understands it instantly. But it lives in a narrow lane: written greetings, TV interview intros, the opening line of a formal email you haven't sent in years. Say it to a friend you bump into on the street and it lands like you're reading off a card.
어떻게 지내세요?
eo-tteo-ke ji-nae-se-yo?
How are you (getting by)?
Textbook-formal — writing, interviews, strangers. Rare in real speech.
잘 지냈어?
jal ji-nae-sseo?
Have you been well?
Reunion-only — said when you haven't seen someone in a while.
요즘 어때?
yo-jeum eo-ttae?
How's it going lately?
The real small-talk opener, used with people you see often.
밥 먹었어?
bap meo-geo-sseo?
Have you eaten?
Everyday care-check — no absence required.
When to Use Which One
The rule that trips people up: 잘 지냈어? has a built-in condition. It means “have you been well since I last saw you,” so firing it at a coworker you saw yesterday sounds off — it implies real time has passed. 요즘 어때? carries no such baggage; it's the one you can use with anyone you already know, any day of the week.
| Phrase | Best used with | Implies time apart? |
|---|---|---|
| 어떻게 지내세요? | Strangers, formal writing, interviews | No — but sounds distant |
| 잘 지냈어? | Someone you haven't seen in weeks or months | Yes — that's the whole point |
| 요즘 어때? | Friends, coworkers, anyone you see regularly | No |
| 밥 먹었어? | Parents, close friends, roommates, coworkers | No |
Answering: 잘 지내요 vs the Honest 그냥 그래
English has one ritual answer to “how are you” (“fine, thanks”), and Korean has its own version: 잘 지내요 (jal ji-nae-yo), “I'm doing well.” Say it on autopilot and nobody blinks. But Korean also has a fully normal, non-alarming way to admit things are just okay: 그냥 그래 (geu-nyang geu-rae) — “just so-so.” It's not a cry for help. It's closer to a shrug with words attached.
- 잘 지내요 (jal ji-nae-yo) — “I'm doing well.” The safe, default answer.
- 그냥 그래 (geu-nyang geu-rae) — “Just so-so.” Honest, low-key, doesn't invite follow-up questions.
- 그럭저럭 (geu-reok-jeo-reok) — “Getting by.” Slightly more resigned than 그냥 그래, still perfectly normal.
- 별로야 (byeol-lo-ya) — “Not great, honestly.” Reserved for close friends — this one does invite a follow-up.
Texting: 뭐 해? Is Korea's Real “How Are You”
Open KakaoTalk and you won't find 어떻게 지내세요? anywhere. You'll find 뭐 해? (mwo hae?) — “what are you doing?” — sent by friends, situationships, and idols to their group chats a hundred times a day. It's rarely asking for a literal itinerary. It's a ping that means “I'm thinking about you, talk to me,” dressed up as a logistics question.
오랜만이야! 잘 지냈어?
o-raen-ma-ni-ya! jal ji-nae-sseo?
It's been a while! Have you been well?
그냥 그래... 요즘 좀 바빴어.
geu-nyang geu-rae... yo-jeum jom ba-ppa-sseo.
Just so-so... been a bit busy lately.
밥은 먹었어?
ba-beun meo-geo-sseo?
But did you at least eat?
아직. 너는 뭐 해?
a-jik. neo-neun mwo hae?
Not yet. What are you up to?
나도 방금 끝났어. 밥 먹으러 갈래?
na-do bang-geum kkeun-na-sseo. bap meo-geu-reo gal-lae?
Just finished too. Want to go eat?
Frequently asked questions
What's the actual Korean phrase for “how are you”?
There's no single equivalent. The textbook phrase is 어떻게 지내세요? (eo-tteo-ke ji-nae-se-yo), but it's rarely spoken casually. In daily conversation, Koreans use 잘 지냈어? after time apart, 요즘 어때? for regular small talk, or 밥 먹었어? as an everyday care-check — each covers a slice of what English squeezes into one question.
Is 어떻게 지내세요? rude or wrong to use?
Not wrong — just formal. It's grammatically correct and understood instantly, but it sounds like a written greeting or a customer-service line rather than something a friend says on the street. Save it for emails, interviews, or speaking to someone significantly older or unfamiliar to you.
What does 밥 먹었어? mean, and why do Koreans ask it so much?
Literally “have you eaten,” 밥 먹었어? functions as an everyday how-are-you, especially from parents, roommates, and close coworkers. It doesn't require someone to have been away — it's just a built-in way of checking that you're taking care of yourself, rooted in decades where that question wasn't rhetorical.
How do I answer 잘 지냈어? if things aren't actually great?
You don't have to say 잘 지내요 (“I'm doing well”) if it isn't true. 그냥 그래 (geu-nyang geu-rae, “just so-so”) is a completely normal, low-drama answer Koreans use constantly. It signals things are mid without inviting a full conversation — save the details for someone closer if you actually want to talk.
What's the Korean version of “how are you” over text?
뭐 해? (mwo hae?, “what are you doing?”) is the real texting equivalent — friends and couples send it constantly, and it's rarely about your literal schedule. It works as a low-pressure way to open a conversation, the Korean version of a text that just means “hey, thinking of you.”